well...

Thursday, December 06, 2007

not exactly the 12 days of Christmas





in twelve days i will leave my home. i will leave behind faces, hands, hopes and memories that i don't want to let go of. i will have to say that dreaded word . . . "goodbye." and i don't want to. not even a little bit. i've been thinking about running water, flushing toilets, fresh fruit, jamba juice, and the thing is, i'd give it all up to stay here. i DID give it all up to stay here. but now i'm going back. it hasn't really sunk in yet. because i've left for Christmas before, this just seems like another holiday right now. but i won't see them anymore. and i can't even begin to put that hurt into words.

25 Comments:

Blogger Angela said...

Oh, You You...I can't even imagine the hurt you are going through right now. I know it's going to be very hard on you to say goodbye. But to a lot of our kids you just have to say "see ya later". If I have to get on a plane and fly my kids to you...you WILL see them again!! They love you soooo much and it shows. You will always be a part of their stories. As they look back with fond memories they will always remember you and the love you showed them. I'll be praying for the journey ahead knowing that God will heal this hurt!! Love ya!!

6:53 AM  
Blogger Blog said...

I love you Ang.

6:56 AM  
Blogger Gretchen, Frits, Elisabeth, Harrison and Mia said...

I am praying for you friend.

7:08 AM  
Blogger Shannon H. said...

I am sad for you, yet incredibly grateful for you.

Praying.

7:21 AM  
Blogger It's Gonna Be Me said...

You will be missed just the same, Angela! You are in my prayers!

Love,
Colleen

7:25 AM  
Blogger livingpurereligion said...

You You, I am praying for you. I can't even begin to imagine how you must feel. When we left Japan, my heart broke wide open and I'm still mourning the loss of our life there. Praise God that because we are His... we never really have to say goodbye. Just see you later. For truly, even if we never meet again with those we love here on Earth, heaven truly is our home. And oh, what a family reunion that will be!

8:46 AM  
Blogger Sarah and Tim said...

I agree with Angela, You know several of the kids are coming to the same area, and as far as I am concerned, you are welcome anytime, you let us know when, and we will find a place for you to stay, as often and as long as you like! praying for you!

8:54 AM  
Blogger Michelle said...

Praying for you my friend!!

I love you

12:40 PM  
Blogger Brandy and Troy said...

Praying for you!!!!

2:01 PM  
Blogger Karen Combes said...

I'm praying for you. My heart hurts for you.
Karen

2:09 PM  
Blogger Kathy Eden said...

Cara put it very nicely. I am praying for you as well. You know that you always have a room open at my house when you come to visit the "E" crew.

2:09 PM  
Blogger The Haiti Lady said...

SO, you are not going back after the holidays? I am not up on the latest info, but love to read your blog.....
LeAnne The Haiti Lady

2:26 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You You I am praying for you! I am so sorry that you are hurting so much right now. I can't imagine how you must feel.
God has used you in such an amazing way for these children and all of us adoptive parents and He will continue to use you. I am so grateful for you and to you!
Love ya,
Jamie

4:17 PM  
Blogger Unknown said...

I love you.

7:50 PM  
Blogger megan haug said...

i wish there was something i could say to just take away the hurt!! but of course, there isn't. so just know i'm praying for you as well. love you!

10:29 PM  
Blogger Kristina said...

Words could never do justice for what I want to express. So just know this...I love you, you will be missed profoundly, and we will be praying!

8:38 PM  
Blogger Anne said...

I love you so much!
I am praying for you..
if it makes you feel any better I will take good care of them while I am there...
I love you sister

7:21 PM  
Blogger Jeremy said...

Angela, I could not begin to tell you the comfort we have had knowing you are there in our absence. We have taken heart knowing that our children were loved and cared for by someone who was there for more than a job. Their care was given by the Father's hands through your touch, but yet I feel your ministry was more to us as parents. In a third world with so little to offer, you have given these children a glimpse of their world to come. They will never forget you, and you will always have a place in their hearts... and our home.

10:30 PM  
Blogger Elias said...

i am praying for you, sistre. daily and then some.

look at the love that has been poured out to you even on this page. as these people see you in person in the future i'm sure you will, then, know that love even more.

but i'm glad you will be living close to me for a time. because i want to see you, and love you, and stand with you through the times to come.

i love you.

9:34 AM  
Blogger Donald said...

Angela,
I am keeping you and the kids in my prayers. I'm sad to hear that you will be going away from there. I know that you have done such good.

5:11 PM  
Blogger Tanya said...

Angela,
I am sure that you will be missed by the kids as much as you will miss the kids. You have been an angel sent from heaven for them and for us. You are welcome to visit us anytime you choose as so many before me have stated. We love you and we wish you all the very best that God can give you.

3:36 PM  
Blogger Tanya said...

Angela,
I am sure that you will be missed by the kids as much as you will miss the kids. You have been an angel sent from heaven for them and for us. You are welcome to visit us anytime you choose as so many before me have stated. We love you and we wish you all the very best that God can give you.

3:36 PM  
Blogger Shanley said...

I'm so sorry baby.

10:50 AM  
Blogger Todd said...

As I sit here, and once again like a hundred times before you have ade tears stream down my face. You my friend and sister are amazing and will ALWAYS be a part of our childens lives. God has a brilliant plan for you in this new chaper (but still the same journey) of your life. and I can't wait to see these new pages turn. I can never truly put into words how much you mean to our family, especially Jo and Ellie. You will be missed there for this season, but I have no doubts that God will take you back to this place you call home, and many trips to a little place called evansville - which i hear will have a few little hatian angels to visit with... Love ya Sis!

7:06 PM  
Blogger CG said...

You are gone now, but certainly not forgotten. That is a tremendous testimony to your faithfulness and your love for these children and their families. I'm rraying for you and your little one. Knowing you'll train him/her to have a heart like your own I can't see this as a loss. The world needs more You-Yous!

4:50 PM  

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