well...

there and back again

2008-05-14T09:05:00.001-07:00

a title that would make any baggins proud. and, methinks, samwise gamgee as well.

on march 4, 2006 i posted my first blog post. i found this sign while wondering the streets of venice beach with my friend rocco. i was about to embark on a great journey and felt that one chapter of my life was closing while another was beginning. i believe since then i have written not mere chapters, but an entire book on this blog. i find it appropriate to close with this same picture. for surely, this is the end.

i have been informed that three angels will be looking for a couple to take over in the position as house manager. this fits the biblical picture of a family and i believe it is a good decision for the organization.

in light of this, i think it would be fairly ridiculous of me to go on posting on a blog whose address places me in haiti when clearly, i am not. and i cannot go on commenting as you-you . . . a nickname that in time will fade as many nicknames do.

some brief highlights:
* in the two years, two months and 12 days that i have been posting on well . . ., this is my 179th post. in contrast, the blog gretchen and i started for the children ran from october 2006 to december 2007 with a grand total of 205 posts!
* during this time i have watched children enter and exit the orphanage by many various means, i have seen transformed lives, i watched a complete miracle in the life of guerda (layla), i fell in love with countless children and haitian people, and i was blessed abundantly by Christ in meeting all of you: my incredible support system!
* i have had "visitors" on my blog from many many far reaching countries.
* i learned a new language
* i have started my own . . . "family."

i want to thank you for sharing with me in this journey. i don't yet know what the future holds, but as for myself, i will abide as i have always said in this: that i know Whom i have believed and am persuaded that He is able to keep that which i've committed unto Him against that day!

i cannot lie: i'm scared. i'm sad. i miss my children everyday. but the Lord is greater than that which is in the world and i can rest in that.

goodbye.

it's time

2008-05-07T13:06:00.013-07:00

noah when i first met him (march 2006)
noah when i last saw him (dec 2007)
mia when i first met her (march 2006)
mia when i left (dec 2007)
tiny little hope (march 2006)
school girl (dec 2007)
baby alixson (march 2006)
cupcake man (dec 2007)
itty bitty nancy (sept 2006)
bright eyed beauty (dec 2007)
oh my little steven on his second day (march 2006)
what a big guy! (dec 2007)
the day angela came in (may 2006)
grown up mama (dec 2007)

i have been praying these kids home since as early as march 2006 when i first arrived at the o! some of you have been praying a lot longer than that!!! and FINALLY it's getting down to coming home time!!! this is the home stretch and i cannot wait for them to slide into base! what a day of rejoicing that will be!!!

come quickly, kids, we're waiting for you!!!!

i want to thank you

2008-05-03T18:19:00.006-07:00

this is a post for all of you. there are so many of you out there who have been so incredibly supportive of me in the past number of months. i have been amazed at Christ in you. i wish i could thank you properly. there are so many of you and i couldn't seem to find pictures of each of you. but i made this video to recognize you because you have truly been the body of Christ. you have taken on His grace and forgiveness in dealing with me as your sister and i have been blessed a thousand times over because of it. hopefully most of you will see yourself in at least one picture. some key people who are not pictured here are duane and doreen, teresa (except for a tiny shot behind the collins at the airport), kea, jim and deanna, abbie, jodi d, ron and tammi, steve and angie, michelle crawford, thane, nate, donald, and nancy and allen, not to mention numerous people at OEFC (but they don't read my blog). the visits, the letters, the phone calls, the PRAYERS that have been sent my way or heavenward respectively have been my sustenance. i want to thank you.

freedom of speech, freedom of press . . .

2008-04-24T22:28:00.002-07:00

this afternoon my brother and i went to see the new ben stein documentary expelled: no intelligence allowed.
and i would like to say: see it. go learn. and while some of the imagery may be a bit hyperbolic, the message is true and clear: it is an infringement on our freedom to not be allowed to explore the THEORY of intelligent design in the classroom. ben stein is not a Christian. ben stein is not even advocating creationism. he is simply asking why are we not allowed to bring an alternative theory to the table?
there are some incredibly bold statements in this film which i was impressed that he was willing to make and that the theaters played. go see for yourselves and take along a friend. the ties between darwinism, nazism all the way down to planned parenthood were chilling. but don't let me tell you. seek out the truth for yourselves.

for sarah, who asked

2008-04-24T09:24:00.003-07:00

i am: saved by grace!
i think: flowers are amazing.
i know: how to make a perfect latte.
i want: to go home.
i have: the greatest family ever.
i wish: it wasn't so freakin' cold!
i hate: mushy bananas.
i miss: sleeping on my tummy.
i fear: not being with my kids again.
i feel: ginormous!
i hear: the heater kicking on.
i smell: like my shampoo (thanks, shanley!).
i crave: peanut butter!!
i search: for perfect pieces of flair.
i wonder: boy or girl? boy or girl?
i regret: not being more kind.
i love: spring! no . . . summer!! no . . . fall!
i ache: for papa judah, nicole, bethany, noah . . .
i care: about doing things right.
i always: enjoy a glass of cold water.
i am not: going to vote for obama or hillary.
i believe: in Christ alone!
i dance: not so much. you don't want to see that.
i sing: in the car.
i cry: because i'm a pregnant girl!! i can't help it!
i don't always: cry so much.
i fight: for clarity and truth.
i write: a lot . . .
i never: say 'never' whatever i do.
i listen: fairly well.
i need: to read my bible more.
i am happy about: the coyote that just passed by the window, that i'm gonna see my friends this weekend, that i'm going to hang out with my brother today . . .

i think i'm supposed to pass this along. let's see . . .
cara, cara, tanya, hope, and michelle.

musings, Scriptures, prayers, planifications, patience, and hope

2008-04-19T11:18:00.008-07:00

hold on, folks: this is gonna be a long one. i am prepared to call it "ode to kristina" considering the length, honesty and soul-searching that may be involved!

there is a picture on my parents' fridge of my brother, cousin and i. i am guessing i am about 6 and elias is about 4 in said picture. you know, i'll share it:

i look at this picture often while i'm in the kitchen. we are at my grandmother's house and clearly enjoying ourselves, though not really doing much of anything. what i see when i look at this picture (as most pictures of children invoke) is innocence. we were so young and so innocent. and yet that idea clashes with what the bible teaches us about human nature. we are not born with a "tabula rasa", sorry aristotle, sorry john locke. not a single one of us has a clean slate from birth. romans 5:12 tells us that sin entered the world through one man and that death (the consequence of sin: eternal separation from Christ) spread to all men because all sinned. continuing in verse 14, paul outlines that death reigned . . . "even over those who had not sinned in the likeness of the offense of adam." there it is. we are all sinners because we are all of adam, regardless of age or "innocence."
so at age 6 so bright-eyed and "innocent" i was already a sinner. not only that but psalm 139: 16 says, " . . . in Thy book they were all written, the days that were ordained for me. when as yet there was not one of them." He, Christ, foreknew EACH of my days. (selah)

He formed me, He knit me together in my mother's womb. and He KNEW what i would be come. He knew all my sins before i ever committed them and yet He knocked on the door of my heart. He sought me out. He saved me!!!!!

i know i say this all the time, but, "what a mighty God we serve?!!" His grace overwhelms me. that He would go to the cross on my behalf knowing that i would sin against His holiness is unfathomable.

i know many of you have heard me say my favorite verse is james 1:27. and it is. james may be my favorite book. but my other favorite book is ephesians. actually, that section of my bible is so worn out, i can pull pages of ephesians right out of my bible and read them on their own! ephesians 2 in particular is wonderous. however, i have another favorite verse. something carsen shared with me recently called this verse to mind:
"and what do you have that you did not receive?" 1 cor 4:7b
i don't think anyone should read this verse and not take a moment to reevaluate . . . everything. what do i have that i did not receive? life? breath? family? job? friends? health? security? my home? my three cars? my bed? my couch?
do you follow me?! with this perspective, we need to change how we view ourselves in relation to Christ and others. okay, i now acknowledge that Christ has given me all things because without whatever talents i may possess, i would not have whatever job or friends i have. therefore, since my talents and my very life came from Christ, i have earned none of this, rather it has been given to me. therefore, i cannot boast in any of it. and furthermore, i must have incredible amounts of compassion on others!! because we are all heirs of grace. not a single one of us earned any of this. i was given these gifts. and i was not worthy of them. so how could i ever be so foolish as to think that someone else may not be deserving of the gifts given them?!! who am i?!
as Christians, we must have a love and compassion that far outweighs the "love" the world shows. because we understand our humble and meager position before Christ and the grace He has bestowed on us.

okay, let's go back to mini me. washed by blood and lavished with grace, sinner that i am, i grew up. and here i am today in a situation i never meant to be in; one that is not in itself glorifying to my Savior. but what does the Scripture say? "and we know that God causes ALL THINGS (caps mine) to work together for GOOD!! (caps and punctuation mine) to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose." rom. 8:28

and this i have found to be true. the Lord, Who is sinless, has used my sin to glorify His name a hundred times over since the time of my confession. and i am amazed. is that not grace? is that not compassion? what a mighty God we serve!!

this "situation" as i called it has taken me from my home. i feel a million miles away from where i want to be. i ache for my chlldren and for the employees of angel house. i miss them constantly. others who have been in my "situation" (that's starting to be a funny word to me) have not always had to leave their homes. not only that but those who possibly did leave their homes probably were free to decide for themselves whether or not they could return home. my case is different. or so i sometimes am so disillusioned to think. but that verse comes back to me. what do i have that i did not receive? are other women free to decide anything for themselves? am i? or does the Lord know "all the days that were ordained" for me?
there is so much to consider about going home. is it the right choice for me? is it the right choice for my child? is it the right choice for the children or employees of angel house? is it the right choice for the organization?
and sometimes my sinful, selfish side thinks, "why does anyone else get to decide what happens in my life?" but that thought is laughable. do i really think it's up to me anyway?!! He already knows!! He has gone before me! He has plans to prosper me! (jer. 29:11)

as you know, i recently worked on a fundraiser for some friends in southern california. in so doing i had the opportunity to design tee shirts for some of the kids i know and love. one of them was for miss suterlande hope cundiff, whom i adore. she used to call me "mama you-you" but has dropped the "mama" now that she has one of her own!! anyhow, the shirt i made for hope had these balloons on it and read "hope floats." in october of last year i posted a picture of this precious little girl and talked about having hope even when the outlook is bleak. today i have no idea what tomorrow holds. i don't know but my God knows. He has each and every day written down in His book. and so i will have hope. i will trust. because He knew all along that i was coming to this point. He saw that little girl in her patchwork slippers looking so "innocent" and He lead her to haiti. He instilled that love and compassion for His people, His orphans, His widows into her heart at a young age and He knew where it would all lead. so i have nothing to fear and everything to gain in simply following Him.

nothings

2008-04-17T21:00:00.002-07:00

i have had some interesting feedback from my previous post though not all of it was through comments so a lot of you don't know about said feedback. for those of you interested, i would highly suggest checking in with copperhill and listen to brian's other sermons. i am currently listening to his series about living on mission. the Word of God is powerful and transforming; listen to it!!

i know that most of you readers are already parents and have read this a number of times already. if so, you can sit patiently and wait for my next post. if not, i thought it was sweet and worth repeating here. i have no idea who wrote it so i apologize to the author ahead of time for my blatant plagiarism (or piracy, if you will!).

a child's view

when you thought i wasn't looking i saw you hang my first painting on the refrigerator, and i immediately wanted to paint another one.

when you thought i wasn't looking i saw you feed a stray cat, and i learned that it was good to be kind to animals.

when you thought i wasn't looking i saw you make my favorite cake for me, and i learned that the little things can be the special things in life.

when you thought i wasn't looking i heard you say a prayer, and i knew that there is a God i could always talk to, and i learnt to trust in HIm.

when you thought i wasn't looking i saw you give of your time and money to help people who had nothing, and i learned that those who have something should give to those who don't.

when you thought i wasn't looking i saw you take care of our house and everyone in it, and i learned we have to take care of what we are given.

when you thought i wasn't looking i saw tears come from your eyes, and i learned that sometimes things hurt, but it's alright to cry.

when you thought i wasn't looking i saw that you cared, and i wanted to be everything that i could be.

when you thought i wasn't looking i learned most of life's lessons that i need to know to be a good and productive person when i grow up.

when you thought i wasn't looking i looked at you and wanted to say, "thanks for all the things i saw when you thought i wasn't looking.

each of us (parent, grandparent, aunt, uncle, teacher or friend) influence the life of a child.

i'm not really sure what else to say tonight. i am praying that the Lord gives me the grace to be a good mother. please pray with me.

the cost of following Jesus

2008-04-07T23:59:00.003-07:00

one of the greatest things about being in the states (for however long i may be here) has been going to church! i love being surrounded by believers and being challenged to grow in my walk with Christ. my home church is copperhill and i love being able to visit when i'm in southern california. two weeks ago i was there and my pastor preached this sermon. it was so good to hear and i really wanted to share it with all of you. now i know you're busy with your kids, school, work, families and everything. i also know that brian has never preached a 20 minute sermon! however, if you download it, you can break up your listening time and i think it is worth listening to.
did i mention it will challenge you? :)

42 days

2008-04-02T15:08:00.003-08:00

that's right: there are 42 days until my birthday. and yes, i'm due on my birthday. and for those of you who don't know, it's also my dad's birthday. so we're getting ready to celebrate some birthdays around here. did i mention that my brother's birthday is the day before?!
i realize that i have some time left, but i thought putting together the changing table and the crib ahead of time can't be a bad idea!

update

2008-03-31T11:20:00.003-08:00

well, once again the Lord has moved mightily among us! i want to follow up and let you all know that the "for the love of levi" fundraiser last night went extremely well! i was not able to be there, but we had tee shirts and onesies present for sale. and thankfully, the davenports were blessed with nearly $5500!!
i realize that in terms of medical bills this is not an overwhelming amount and that in the future we will need to fundraise again, however we will rejoice in the blessings of the Lord!! He provides every step of the way! the family is incredibly gracious and grateful for all the Lord's blessings and the way His people gave sacrificially.

i personally want to thank all of you who helped out by ordering onesies, tee shirts, or simply donating money! may the Lord bless you!

pi bon zanmi'm

2008-03-30T19:57:00.004-08:00

today was mia's birthday. mis is my best friend. that's what we call each other. actually, we often just call each other "pi bon" which means "most good!"

my best friend and i, we've had some pretty fantastic times together. i miss her all the time. i miss that gravelly voice and her willingness to help. i miss how we laugh at noah's attempts to talk without stuttering! i miss how she helps bethany say things correctly. i miss how she loves to hold babies and take care of them. i miss her calling zimbolita (my cat) her child. i miss her beautiful smile and laugh. i miss her sleeping next to me. or crowded in with bethany too! i miss her helping water the plants or hang laundry with belle.

i miss her spunk and even her sass. i love you, mia me!!

bon fet, gretchen!

2008-03-20T21:15:00.006-08:00

my dear friend, i want to write to you today and thank you for . . . everything! you have been wonderful to me for the past 25 months of my life and i want you to know i appreciate you beyond words. thank you for giving so much of yourself! thank you for extending such grace to me! thank you for caring and for acting upon what you know is right. thank you for loving the Lord with your whole heart and wanting to give back to Him. thank you for seeing a need and trying to meet it . . . EVERY DAY for over five years now. thank you, gretchen! i don't know fully, but i have an idea of how taxing this job is on you. but i also know that your love for these children outweighs the burden of the job. thank you for everything you do for each one of these children and their families.

"her children arise and call her blessed . . ." proverbs 31:28a.

these are your children, gretchen. you have provided a home, food, schooling and health care for them in Jesus' Name. wherever they live now, be it in the states, at the "o", with their birth parents . . . their lives have been touched by three angels; they will arise and called you blessed. keep it up! we're so thankful to have you.

i know, i truly know, that some days are hard. i know that you sacrifice so much. take some time for yourself and your family. spend your birthday with them. love on them and let them love on you. get refreshed. we love you. i am praying for you and i hope this is a wonderful year of life.

for the love of levi

2008-03-06T17:56:00.006-08:00

okay friends, let's play a game. how closely do you read my blog? do you remember this fine couple from my new year's eve pictures?

meet kellie and jason davenport. they have a son named levi. levi was born with cystic fibrosis. according to the cystic fibrosis foundation, cf is "an inherited chronic disease that affects the lungs and digestive system."

because of his disease, little levi has spent far too much time in a hospital than your typical 24 month old. on top of the normal concerns of parenting, kellie and jason have to deal with the incredible risk of infection that levi faces constantly. they have to deal with living for weeks on end in hospital rooms while levi is seeking treatment. and sadly, this also adds significantly to their medical bills.

imagine the early years of your marriage. you probably didn't have a lot of extra cash.
thankfully, kellie and jason, have a wonderful family and church family (www.copperhillchurch.org) who have been very supportive through all of this. kellie and jason have started a campaign which they call "for the love of levi." please watch the following video about levi and the fight against cf.

alright, back to my game. i'm sure you all remembered the prom picture but do you remember when my friend emily and i made custom onesies for my baby? (http://angelainhaiti.blogspot.com/2008/02/cutest.html) well, emily and i are teaming up again to make some new onesies. this time they will be raffled off or sold at an upcoming fundraiser for levi! we are really excited to be involved in helping our friends out!

here is where you can come into play:
if you would like a custom onesie or child-sized tee shirt you can request one right here on my blog!! emily and i will be making them next week. they will be for donation (feel free to give generously), and all funds received will go directly to the davenports' medical bills. thank you for your support!!

my little girl is five today!!

2008-03-03T21:34:00.007-08:00

as those of you avid "well..." readers know, i like to dedicate a post or two every once in awhile to a special little girl named bethany. today, march 4th, is bethany's 5th birthday! just in case any of you were wondering about the wonders the Lord works in a place like three angels, let these photos dispel all doubt:

praise the Lord God for His work in saving this girl's life!!

i put together this slide show for my little girl to try to say how much i love her. i wish i could be with her today and tell her myself, but for now this will have to do.
when i arrived at the o, bethany was incredibly shy bordering on scared. she did not warm up to anyone white. i stayed out of her way, not wanting to overwhelm her. i let her come to me in her own time. and when i did, what a blessing!! she is so lovable, so full of life. she loves to help and loves to please! she loves to sing and dance. she has one of the best laughs in the world!
i miss her fingers and toes. i miss the way she tucks her bottom lip into her mouth. i miss the way she says, "latide?!" when i call to her! i miss trying to figure out what the heck she's saying. i miss pulling her two fingers out of her mouth when she falls asleep.

oh tetanik, mwen sonje'w anpil! m'ap priye pou ou. le Bondye fe'm toune, ke'm ap kontann anpil!! bon fet, petit mwen. mwen te voye papa'w ale visite'w jodi-a, tande?! la'p fe anpil ti bo pou ou. sa yo mwen te voye pou ou!! na we le Bondye vle!!

video killed the radio star

2008-03-01T23:38:00.002-08:00

i was going through my videos and came across this. i figured you'd all like to see it. though ellie may be the most vocal, a number of children are featured including an early appearance of rebecca. this was taken in august. hope you enjoy!

oh goodness!!

2008-02-28T19:48:00.007-08:00

it was hard, i admit, when i first moved to haiti to make friends. i couldn't speak a word of creole and i didn't know exactly how to relate to the nannies. but one woman was kind to me right from the start. nicole. she attempted to joke with me. she told me about her family. she asked about mine.
nicole always has a smile. she has the best laugh; it's so contagious! i hate her days off. they are never as fun as the days she is at angel house. it's just a little bit more quiet around the house.
nicole is my confidante. nicole is my sound board. she is kind and trustworthy! she loves the children, especially ellie. she often allows ellie to "help" her with her housework!
while i was out of town and unable to access my pictures, nicole had a birthday! i'm so sorry to have missed it. michelle, can you please show her this post?!
bon fet, zanmi'm!! mwen sonje'w ANPIL!! mwen toujou ap priye pou ou e pou tout fanmi'w tou! salye valencia, kinsley e schnider pou mwen!

late again

2008-02-25T16:09:00.003-08:00

alixson, baby, i did not forget your birthday! i was in the hospital with my brother and driving through a snowstorm!! you'll learn about snow soon enough! anyhow, i did not forget and i am happy you're a big 3 now! when i first met you you were so tiny there in your papa bob's arms! and just look at you now!
do you remember this from last year? probably not, but i sure do!

this is gonna be a good year for you, alixson! you're going home soon!

little boy blue

2008-02-11T17:52:00.000-08:00

well, friends, i think we may be talking about a boy . . .

i know, i know that after the ultrasound a lot of you were convinced of that. but i was still thinking it could go either way. but today i had a fill-in midwife (who i loved and wish wasn't retired!) and i think she nearly slipped. i'm pretty sure she nearly said, "he."

:) so, in keeping with fairfield tradition, i think we may be having a boy!!

missed but not forgotten birthdays

2008-02-10T22:54:00.000-08:00

i was out of town and couldn't access my pictures, but i just want to say, "bon fet, nata!" and, "bon fet, spend!!" i miss you both so much and you are in my prayers. i know the Lord has a wonderful plan for each of your lives and i pray you discover it early on and seek it wholeheartedly! i love you. mwen sonje'w anpil! m'ap priye pou ou, tande'm?

white trash superbowl party - 4th year running

2008-02-03T20:33:00.000-08:00

well, it was quite a game, eh folks? what a fourth quarter!! but no game beats a party like this. chili. fritos. vanilla pudding with nilla wafers. vienna sausages and twinkies. and mullets, or mullet!!

cutest

2008-02-01T22:44:00.001-08:00

okay, tonight my dear friend emily and i made our own onesies and oh are they cute!!
are you ready?!!

this is the "little pistol" one and i put a smaller version on the butt

and here is the long awaited pirate one!! (not as funny as megan's, but more appropriate!)

i intend to still make the "crawl the line" onesie, but how cute is this? and then the little "cash" with the guitar is on the arm! like a little tattoo.

buckaroo! how cute is this?

i have a number of favorites, but come on!! this says, "i love my papa" in creole.
and the back has a "dad" tattoo!! cute, cute, cute!

this is also for dad. the headphones are pretty cool!

i felt it was only fitting to make one like this:

this one says, "i'm coming, haiti. are you waiting for me?" a very haitian question/statement.

oh!! can you read it? it says, "give peas a chance." :) so, so cute!

and here it is; the best of the best!
ready?

bon fet, belle

2008-02-01T09:50:00.001-08:00

belle, you truly fit that name, don't you? you are beautiful, belle, inside and out. you are sweet and caring. i know that you want to be home now, and be with your family for your birthday. and i know, I KNOW, your mama wishes she were holding you right now too. you are such a big girl today; you are turning 10!
i miss you. oh how i miss you! but i know that today will be a special day for you even without your whole family! praise God for your brother steven and his love for you! i am praying that you will be home SOON!!!
i love you, honey!
happy birthday!

oh anne!!

2008-01-29T21:12:00.001-08:00

look what just came in the mail!!! a little slice of you-you heaven! anne had all the downstairs children make cards for me with stickers and she did handprints of all the upstairs children!! (except for stephie because her hand doesn't open so well! i got her footprint!) oh anne!! this did my heart so much good!! i miss my kids terribly and it was fun to guess who had made which card! i'm pretty good at that game! bethany is making arms and hands on people! what a surprise! and mia is still misspelling her name, but her drawing is surely improving! daniel really likes stickers and naitile uses the leftovers from the sticker page!! oh, thank you so much, anne! i LOVED this present!!!

blessed

2008-01-28T12:52:00.000-08:00

this is my friend, cathryn achilles. i have known cathryn for about 11 years. she is now 16. cathryn has been diagnosed with Ataxia-telangiectasia. which i cannot pronounce! it is commonly referred to as AT. you can read her story here: webpages.charter.net/jachilles.

when cathryn and her siblings were younger, i used to babysit for them once in awhile. now they are growing up so fast and it's been a privilege to see them become the young adults they are now! last week i was in hollister and i was able to spend some time with her and her family. cathryn greatly surprised me by making a quilt for my baby!! (looks like she thinks it might be a girl too!) needless to say, i cried when she gave me (us) this incredible gift!! thank you, cahtryn!!

i have also been blessed by all of you. i know that you have seen the pictures on this website: blessingyouyou.blogspot.com and i can't thank all of you enough for your gifts!! i set up the crib, you know, just to test it out. and the quilt looks wonderful in the crib! thank you, colleen!!
thank you all for the presents and for your support!

***disclaimer*** just because we have pictured here two winnie-the-pooh bears DOES NOT mean i want to run with that theme!! i'm much more for the vintage piratey and cowboy (girl?) things if we have to do themes at all! :)

here's looking at you!

2008-01-24T16:55:00.001-08:00

okay, i don't have a scanner, so i know this is poor quality and i know it's backwards, but i also knew if i didn't post some of you would be a bit upset! i have already had some threatening emails!!

so, here (she?) is!! i was in the ultrasound room for so long! and the tech was being real quiet so i finally asked if everything was okay. she said, yes, but the first shot she had let her know the sex of the baby and so she was being quiet to make sure she didn't slip and tell me anything! i was a bit jealous that she knew what i am having and i don't. and she can sit there and think to herself, "that silly girl thinks she's having a girl! ha ha ha!" lisa, the lab tech, said that at this stage they all look like skeletor because they don't have any meat on their bones! nice description, eh? :) made me smile!

anyhow, i was on the table for a whole hour and she said everything is fine; praise the Lord!! and i know it's not the best picture, but it's her face! can you see her eyes and nose?

how amazing is our God?!!!

thanks for all your prayers!

2008-01-11T12:33:00.000-08:00

so, i have been. . . not so busy. i have had a lot of time to play on the computer and look for great little items like these. what do you think?! :)
but it turns out a lot of these are fairly pricey so my friend emily suggested getting iron on paper and printing and making our own onesies!! how cute is that?!
i know that a lot of people wouldn't even think about dressing their kids in skulls and crossbones, but to me it just seems to fit! i don't like the scary ones and i don't like the ones with the three teeth-like things coming down from the bottom of their heads, but these guys just seem piratey to me!
in the absence of my 44 children and 58 employees, i seem to be at a slight loss as to how to fill my time. so between making Christ-mas cookies with my mom, reorganizing the closet, unpacking, and becoming prom queen, i've been looking for onesies. if you have a better project for me, by all means, suggest away!!
and don't you worry, i have been reading my bible aloud!! :)

prom 2007

2008-01-01T13:37:00.000-08:00

for all of you loyal (and i really mean loyal) blog readers, you must be aware that last night was our 5th annual martini party. brendie and i love to take a theme and run with it. we have done "vintage hollywood" and a "masquerade ball." but THIS YEAR we threw prom!

every prom has a theme itself and our prom was "starry night." it came complete with corsages, spiked punch and a ballot box. we made posters campaigning for votes and even danced to boyz to men! (did i mention we go all out for our parties?!) i know that every year we say is our best year, but seriously this was an amazing year! we were thrilled with how many people embraced the theme this year and came dressed up and ready to party. we discussed college applications and what we hope to be when we grow up!

and after the ball dropped it was time to count the ballots for prom king and queen.

i will admit, brendie did call my campaign slogan "propaganda" however i found it to be terribly convincing. and clearly, it served it's purpose:

i didn't decorate the kitchen

2007-12-22T10:39:00.001-08:00

so, i'm at my parents' house. it's the wonderful land of soft. soft tissues, soft blankets, soft carpeting, soft voices . . . it's wonderfully soft. it's also Christ-mas. i just left the jostling world of petion-ville, haiti where not very much is soft and it's hard to believe that it's Christ-mastime and i was plunked down right in the middle of this:

so as we're making our delicious Christ-mas cookies (good for the baby), my mother laments, "i didn't decorate the kitchen." i look around. Christ-mas dishes? check. Christ-mas dish towels? check. Christ-mas aprons? check. Christ-mas glasses and pitchers? check. but true, no extra Christ-mas nicknacks to be seen! shocking! what if, just think about this, someone were to enter through the living room, pass all the nativity scenes and find themselves in the barren kitchen?! what would happen? would he/she know it's Christ-mas?!!
would the towels and dishes be enough?
i surely hope so. i hope our hearts and our attitudes would be a better reflection of what Christ-mas is than our living rooms.
thankfully, in my parents' home i know that the point of this holiday time is much greater than decorating and making cookies. the Lord, His birth, His sacrafice, those are the focus of our home! i will pray for you this week, that you too can keep that focus.
even if the kitchen isn't decorated.

i will miss you

2007-12-14T12:31:00.000-08:00

not exactly the 12 days of Christmas

2007-12-06T04:42:00.000-08:00

in twelve days i will leave my home. i will leave behind faces, hands, hopes and memories that i don't want to let go of. i will have to say that dreaded word . . . "goodbye." and i don't want to. not even a little bit. i've been thinking about running water, flushing toilets, fresh fruit, jamba juice, and the thing is, i'd give it all up to stay here. i DID give it all up to stay here. but now i'm going back. it hasn't really sunk in yet. because i've left for Christmas before, this just seems like another holiday right now. but i won't see them anymore. and i can't even begin to put that hurt into words.

pa pa

2007-12-03T06:43:00.000-08:00

okay, i know it's been said, but i just want to say it once again: i miss this boy sooooooo much! his sweet little voice and the way he called me "oo!" and then it evolved to "oo-oo!" his lips and gums in every smile! his slappy feet running toward me!
i always knew it was him without even looking by the way his feet hit the floor! oh, pa pa, how i miss you. i wish i could snuggle with you right now. i know you're happy
in that cold, cold world,
but i'm just saying without you
here we're a little . . . empty.

how i spent my thanksgiving vacation

2007-11-25T04:25:00.000-08:00

how was yours?

2007-11-15T14:22:00.000-08:00

Bless the LORD, O my soul,
And all that is within me, bless His holy name.
Bless the LORD, O my soul,
And forget none of His benefits;
Who pardons all your iniquities,
Who heals all your diseases;
Who redeems your life from the pit,
Who crowns you with lovingkindness and compassion;
Who satisfies your years with good things,
So that your youth is renewed like the eagle.
The LORD performs righteous deeds
And judgments for all who are oppressed.
He made known His ways to Moses,
His acts to the sons of Israel.
The LORD is compassionate and gracious,
Slow to anger and abounding in lovingkindness.
He will not always strive with us,
Nor will He keep His anger forever.
He has not dealt with us according to our sins,
Nor rewarded us according to our iniquities.
For as high as the heavens are above the earth,
So great is His lovingkindness toward those who fear Him.
As far as the east is from the west,
So far has He removed our transgressions from us.
Just as a father has compassion on his children,
So the LORD has compassion on those who fear Him.
For He Himself knows our frame;
He is mindful that we are but dust.
As for man, his days are like grass;
As a flower of the field, so he flourishes.
When the wind has passed over it, it is no more,
And its place acknowledges it no longer.
But the lovingkindness of the LORD is from everlasting to everlasting on those who fear Him,
And His righteousness to children's children,
To those who keep His covenant
And remember His precepts to do them.
The LORD has established His throne in the heavens,
And His sovereignty rules over all.
Bless the LORD, you His angels,
Mighty in strength, who perform His word,
Obeying the voice of His word!
Bless the LORD, all you His hosts,
You who serve Him, doing His will.
Bless the LORD, all you works of His,
In all places of His dominion;
Bless the LORD, O my soul!

my family

2007-11-13T17:32:00.000-08:00

next week my family is coming. my incredible, loving, words-cannot-explain their devotion and support, family. they have been here before but this will be our first time all here together. and i'm so blessed by them. in ecclesiastes, solomon wrote about there being a time for everything under the sun. and my family has stood by me through every season.

thank you, family, for coming. thank you for your love. thank you. . .

i love you.

it's been awhile

2007-11-09T03:59:00.000-08:00

since i posted a picture of my girl and i felt one was due. this one i stole from shanley and can take absolutely 0 credit for. but how gorgeous is my girl?!

farmer brown

2007-11-04T06:01:00.000-08:00

need i say more?

2007-10-28T15:59:00.000-08:00

i love you, gretchen! i'm praying for you right now! you are such a hard worker and you desire to do what is right in every circumstance. you love Jesus with your whole heart and i admire you so much. i just wanted you to know that i think you're wonderful! thanks for giving me the opportunity to serve with you!

hope

2007-10-20T11:11:00.000-07:00

it's not easy, to always have hope. it's not easy. somedays looks more bleak than others. your kids come and go, the process is so long, the government doesn't work the way you want it to, etc.

but "i know Whom i have believed and am persuaded that He is able to keep that which i've committed unto Him against that day." (2 tim 1:12)

what grace, what peace comes from the knowledge of the Holy!? even when the days are bleak and you feel you have no strength, He lifts you up on His mighty wings to carry you through! i will praise Him Who sustains me everyday!!

still praying?

2007-10-17T10:13:00.000-07:00

keep it up! they need it.

2007-10-11T13:10:00.000-07:00

sadly, our dog was stolen this morning.

humble

2007-10-01T08:17:00.000-07:00

just who do i think i am? i get frustrated here often. i can say something so many times and it just doesn't seem to sink in to anyone's head. they say, "okay, you-you." but make no movement toward doing what i've said or asked. ahhhhh! and i get frustrated.
how many times have i said that getting your head wet in the rain doesn't make you sick? but then a "medical professional" comes in and tells them to close the windows so the kids don't get sick. (not because of rain; that had nothing to do with rain.) and i get frustrated.
i know these are not stupid people. i know they are hard workers. i know they have love, and strength and hope in spades. but still . . . i get frustrated.
i think, "why don't they get that?" "why doesn't anyone plan ahead?!" "how many times have i said that?!"

and then i go to church on sunday morning and the man next to me puts in two haitian dollars for his offering. that' about 28 u.s. cents.
and i didn't put in anything.
why? because i don't have a lot of money?! because it's not my regular church?! no excuse.

oh the shame.

but there's more. the man leading communion quoted dietrich bonhoeffer in perfect english from memory.

and i have been so humbled.

who do i think i am?
i'm an american.
i love and love and love my freedom and my country and my rights. i love and love and love that i can travel where i want, when i want, given the funding. i love that i can say JESUS IS LORD and no one will persecute me for it. i love that i had FREE EDUCATION growing up and the opportunity to go to many colleges and universities to study everything i wanted to learn. i love that i can read and understand joseph conrad. i love that i have multiple copies of the bible all to myself.
but sometimes being an american is not something i'm so proud of. why? because of my pride. because of the american mentality that if you just work hard enough, you'll get everything you've worked for. you'll be rich. you'll be healthy, wealthy and wise. but most of this world lives in poverty.
in poverty like this. and forced to work like this:

with this outside their front door:

just who do i think i am? am i any greater than the man next to me in church? oh Heaven, no. just because i have had opportunity and praise God for it, but who am i?! the Word says, " . . . and what do you have that you did not receive?" 1 cor. 4:7
so, praise God for free education which has taught you cause and effect (something you now categorize as "common sense"). and praise God you can read and learn scientific facts about your health, your body, the way the world works. praise God you have a bible of your own to read! praise God you have a job and the opportunity to promote or transfer. praise God you have acquired the skills to discern, to use wisdom, to plan ahead, to deduce. praise God for your HMO as much as you'd like to complain about which doctor it allows you to see. but don't do what i do. don't think it makes you special. don't think you're somehow important because you're smart. don't do that.
because you're wrong.

i'm wrong.

i'm nothing and i have nothing apart from what Christ has given to me.
teach me Your humility, O God!
forgive me all my hideous pride.
and somehow find a way to use even me, chief sinner among sinners, for Your glory.

mac fun

2007-09-26T07:30:00.000-07:00

okay, angela, you asked for it! here is some of the mac fun we've had:

the beauty of a mac

2007-09-23T17:22:00.000-07:00

well, as i said, i don't have batteries in my camera (which has been doubling as a battery eater) right now. not for the first (or last time) i am beyond thankful for my computer which also has a built in camera!! so in follow up to my previous post, i will say . . . here's mia! gap-toothed and rich . . . or not. :)

tooth fairy

2007-09-21T07:05:00.001-07:00

the tooth fairy has been extremely busy around here. on jeff's birthday (wednesday) samendia pulled out a wayward tooth that had been wiggling around for a little while. immensly proud of herself she came up to show me the tooth. i asked her (while having her deposit it in an envelope and marking the outside) if she remembered what i had told steven about the tooth fairy. she did. she was thrilled to go to sleep that night and even more so to wake up to find $2 ht under her pillow! by the time i got downstairs she had already purchased a lollipop and was sucking on it.
so thrilled was she with this new found money-making scheme that she promptly set to work wiggling another one out! by thursday evening it too was out and she was armed with another envelope!! talk about persistent.
unfortunately, it seems everyone wants a piece of the action and i found belle working on mia's tooth for her. i had to have a talk about not forcing our teeth out and not putting our hands in other people's mouths. that said, mia also came up last night with a tooth in her hand and blood on her lip. this time, however, mia did not throw hers on top of the school for the rats to get it!!! (that may be a story for another time!) things being what they are, neither carsen nor i had any batteries left in our cameras to get mia's picture. you'll just have to believe me that we sent two gap-toothed smiles off to school this morning . . . with lollipops!

aba dee aba dee aba dee, that's all folks!!!

2007-09-18T15:33:00.000-07:00

sorry, folks, that's it. we're closing up shop! joslin (like "justin") has a family and that's the last of our kids for now! look how our God provides for us!! a family for each child? it's almost like He had this all planned out, or something!! :)
so now we're going to ask that you pray the Lord will show us the right children to bring in and fill some beds . . . because some of my kids are going home sometime soon! oh, how i love this job!

pros

2007-09-10T08:01:00.000-07:00

it was a great morning here at angel house! thank you for your prayers. unlike last year, the first day of school this year went incredibly smoothly! the kids were up, bathed, fed, and dressed with time left for pictures. AND they didn't cry when they got there, or when i left them!! praise God! so here are a few shots once they arrived at school this morning. (if you haven't seen thier "first day" shots, check out their blog linked below as "my kids.")
here's jonas! first day and he's already bored. well, i think he just wanted to get in the classroom and get on with it, but mr. alix had a lot of important things to explain to the children on their first day!

to further promote the family atomosphere this morning, mr. alix hugged nancy and greeted her by name! makes your mama heart feel good when the headmaster takes time to know your kids!belle, hope and mia dusted their shoes to make themselves presentable! (sorry, michelle, the ones you sent were too big! but we found another pair for mia and we'll keep yours on hand; she'll grow into them!)
hope looked a bit lost.
jeff scoped things out.
isabel looked happier once she got her uniform just a bit dirty!
and steven, sweet steven, prayed for a good first day!

i'm telling you, these kids are pros!

plug

2007-09-06T09:16:00.000-07:00

okay, so people often ask how they can help three angels. here is an easy way that i use myself that helps us financially and doesn't cost you anything more than you're already willing to spend!! intrigued?
let's say you're planning on making an online purchase, okay? you merely go to our website: threeangelshaiti.org, to the donation page and click on our link "amazon for three angles." no extra cash will be added to your purchase, but a percentage WILL BE DONATED to three angels!
that way next time you purchase a book, a movie, some sheets, or an mp3 player, you can help one of these:

ps - you can shop target and office depot through the amazon website!

jonas at the pool

2007-09-02T18:25:00.001-07:00

for kristina who loves "tootsie pictures."
little monkey.
red balloon.
okay, so the kid didn't spend much time in the water. at least he had a fun afternoon!

really bad news

2007-09-01T14:45:00.000-07:00

friends, family, big sunglass wearers of the world, i have some terrible news. today i lost my signature sunglasses in fermathe. i'm not sure how it happened as i usually keep track of my things, but that's the way it is, i guess.

with nothing more to report, i will sign off.
your fearless (nekked-eyed) leader,
you-you

beauty

2007-08-22T08:21:00.000-07:00

there is beauty all around me.in her eyes.
in her smile.
in his lips.
i see it in his spirit, in the way he approaches life.
it's in his play!
in her love.
in her perserverance.
in her amazing strength.
in his heart.
in her joy. in upside-down sunglasses!
there is beauty all around me.

my friend

2007-08-15T08:08:00.000-07:00

big girls

2007-08-12T16:30:00.000-07:00

summertime

2007-08-08T17:00:00.000-07:00

sink!!

2007-07-26T08:41:00.001-07:00

that's right, i washed my own dishes this morning in my OWN SINK!!! my friends from evansville and a few from california HAND BUILT this sink for me last week and this morning it was up and running! everyone was so excited to see me washing my dishes, especially nicole and christine who have been washing them for me since october! THANK YOU JEREMY, DAN, AND JASON!!!!

team ice cream

2007-07-15T15:07:00.001-07:00

we miss you girls! please don't forget to come back as soon as you can! thanks for a great three weeks of memories! yeah for ziplocks and for buckets!

2007-07-13T11:40:00.000-07:00

my little girl

2007-07-05T15:54:00.000-07:00

my little cowgirl is growing up fast. too fast somedays. i'm amazed by how she's coming out of her shell and beginning to imitate the older girls so much! she's astounding and i adore her!

vampires

2007-07-03T15:50:00.000-07:00

so katie is teaching carsen how to draw blood. anne said she was game to play guniea pig, so off we went. carsen watched intensely. then she practiced on an orange.
and on me.
SUCCESS!
so then katie started teaching carsen about IVs. anne has "good veins" on her hands. see how good they are? full of blood!
i mean, technically this was a success too! katie definately got the vein. the only problem is the needle had no stop and no bag on it, so where else would the blood go? everywhere, apparently.

three angels?

2007-06-30T20:28:00.000-07:00

anne and carsen, the days get long, hot, confusing, and at times frustrating. but we always come out with some good one-liners and some stories, right? thanks for coming and sharing in this work. thanks for loving on these kids and being involved in their lives. thanks for the laughter, for sharing in the humor of checks and sweaty pants, of magenta and tree trunk neck, of ice cream and dark swimmig pools. i hope it's a great summer!

yo ap domi

2007-06-29T19:03:00.000-07:00

as i've said, the children are afraid of my kittens. (oh, by the way, i now have two kittens: zimbolita and minah.) but last night it seems noah and the cats made up. although when i showed him this picture this morning it didn't help him love them anymore. look, kid, if you can sleep peacefully alongside lita and minah, probably they're not out to get you!

me hermann wi

2007-06-25T19:27:00.000-07:00

the big kids were outside graduating and my camera ran out of memory so i ran in to upload and clear the card. on my way back outside i found the kids stripped down and eating mango on the kitchen floor! i love this picture of hermann! he's a doll!

for jordyn

2007-06-24T17:35:00.000-07:00

look at what God can do! it's a perfect flower!

what i hate about miami international airport

2007-06-21T21:42:00.000-07:00

what other airport makes you haul your luggage up and down 38 terminals on carpet? and then they go and put up these signs to "help." like i really want to know that i've been walking for 29 minutes already and i only have 17 more to go! that's encouraging!
the rough part about it today was that we de-boarded the plane and immediately got on a bus that took us to the terminal. a bus on the tarmac. i'd never done that before. anyhow, it seems the plane had landed where i wanted to be and then the bus took me exactly the opposite direction from there. so then i got to walk myself on back through those walkways up and down escalators and to my terminal! boy was i glad to hit the tile floors!
but I'M HOME!!! i was so happy to get here! anne brought noah to the airport to meet me. apparently she asked the kids who was going to go with her to the airport and he was the lucky one! i was so thrilled to see my kids again! to kiss their little faces and tell them i missed them. i couldn't get in the door; they mobbed me! all the girls have beads in their hair and shaki looks so pretty! well, they all do, really!
jimmy's graduation is in the morning so i should be on my way, but i thought i'd share a bit of my day with y'all first!!
I'M HOME!

onward and florida-ward

2007-06-17T20:58:00.001-07:00

i am now in florida visiting gretchen and family! i had a long day flying (or not flying) but now i am going to go to sleep. my flight this morning was supposed to fly out of dallas love field at 9 am. we boarded and were told we would have to wait due to the weather. after waiting out the rain on the runway for an hour (i was sleeping onboard), we were told that the flight was cancelled - our captain had never arrived. so we de-boarded and i was told i had to retrieve my luggage and find my way to dallas fort worth international. my luggage arrived soaking wet and i got on a shuttle ($25) to dfw with some canadian hockey players. they liked my curly hair and wanted me to go to canada with them. i told them i thought my kids would miss me. they replied to bring the kids with me but i stated that i have 39. so i like shock value; is that so bad?!
anyhow, a very nice lady at dfw put me on standby on a flight that was already supposed to have left, but since everything was delayed she thought i might have a chance. i took the skybus thing to the other terminal only to be told that the flight had been moved to the one i started at, of course. so i returned and caught the flight! amazing! PLUS it was a non-stop! my original flight was scheduled to fly from dallas to austin to raleigh to jacksonville. the only downside to being the only person with a cancelled flight who arrived at their destination EARLY today was the lack of a cell phone which means gretchen was not alerted to my change of plans. so i hung out at the jacksonville airport for awhile and had the opportunity to chat with my family and tell my dad "happy fathers' day!"
it was a great vacation and now i'm just going to relax and get ready to go home! how i miss my kids!!

(by the by, this picture was taken by jared at the gulf of mexico and not in florida.)

gators and lions and tigers, oh my!

2007-06-16T23:05:00.000-07:00

gator talk in louisiana.
i'm mr. blue!
okay, we went on the creole nature trail in lake charles, la and found gators!! look at this guy! i got scared when he looked at me and ducked back through the sunroof!
today we went to an exotic cat refuge in someone's backyard in louisiana. it was incredible! we saw live lions and tigers and cougars and bobcats just a few feet away from us!

okay, so at this bbq place on the side of the road today, this guy was on the wall. we didn't notice it at first, but then bren said, "i've never seen a deer licking it's own neck on a wall before!" I HAD TO TAKE THIS PICTURE!!!
we're back in texas and tomorrow we're all flying out. it's been a fantastic vacation but we're getting a bit tired!

deep south

2007-06-14T20:09:00.000-07:00

oh my my.
that's right! who's the happiest girl in texas? me!! i went sailing in galveston bay last night! oh so happy!
lizzie, this one's for you! they don't just have those phone booths in london, they're on galveston island too! (yes, jeremy i went to the strand!)
this guy didn't smell as bad as jonah's.
the very first thing that happened to me in louisiana was to take this picture while standing on a fire ant hill! dangit that hurt!!!!! not my favorite first impression!
well hello mr gator!
bren taking in the view of lake charles.
while we wouldn't qualify as tree-huggers, we sure did like this one!
why don't we all live in houses like this one!? how beautiful is this house?

so, yeah, we decided why not head over to louisiana. i mean, we're here, and we've got the time, right? this is the vacation of a lifetime! you should be here. wait a minute . . . :)

this great land

2007-06-11T09:25:00.001-07:00

texas, as we all know, is another world. it's big. it's flat. it's not open on sunday. and it's never been this much fun before!! getting our rental car!
our own texas rangers!
the stock yards in fort worth!
we danced with donna, our typical sweet talking texas waitress in her 24 hour diner!
and that's me with the duke for my dad!!

have you ever?!!

2007-06-04T19:35:00.001-07:00

i mean, it's so surreal. who does this? hey, you need to get those ulcers checked out, man. unfortunately we don't do that here. but there's a place about 10 blocks from here. you could go there. you have a car, right?

just go there, get the endoscopie and come on back. we'll keep your room open for you. we won't mop it, or change the bedding or put toilet paper in the bathroom, but you have a bathroom, right!

plus you have those pushy american girls with you, one of them will hold the bag for you. you'll be fine.

thank you thank you thank you all for your continued prayers for junior. it's really hard to do the hospital thing and see the care they receive and know what they could receive. what everyone deserves to receive, you know?

it's a wonderful thing to be in the hands of such a mighty God! please continue to go to Him on behalf of junior and also jimmy, who is short on sleep!

i love you all.

texas, here we come!

2007-06-02T08:34:00.000-07:00

that's right. these fun kids and i are headed for texas for a week of wonder and excitement!

we have some activities planned already, but we're open to suggesstions. any thoughts? not like with this bunch we will be short on fun! i mean, just look at jared and that balloon!

new little ones

2007-05-28T19:07:00.000-07:00

okay, so a lot of you know this already but today was a day of new ones! my cat, zimbolo, sadly left me over a month ago. as there is still a need for a cat in the house, i got a little kitten. i actually bought her a week or two ago but she was still too small to leave her mama. in honor of my first one, i have named her "zimbolita." (it's a little baby girl cat!)

and i thought that would be the exciting news for the day until this afternoon when jean nathan brought in a little boy just ten days old!! his mother hadn't named him yet, so guess who got to name him? that's right! yours truly! now please understand we don't have all his info yet or his exam results so he's not yet available for adoption, but just look at my little caleb and marvel at him!!

but seriously

2007-05-26T18:58:00.000-07:00

okay, this "who is jean bernard" stuff is fun and all but i think it's time to get back to all things serious. the question at hand is who is coming in july with enough room left in their suitcase for the very last harry potter books?!? this is serious, folks!

better late?

2007-05-22T14:21:00.000-07:00

as promised, this is a picture of part of the outside patio where we ate my birthday dinner! isn't it beautiful?
the table you see at the end of the bridge is where we sat.

junia, jimmy's girlfriend gave me some new dressy tank tops which was really nice of her! and i ate like a queen! i had a seafood platter kind of thing. lobster, shrimp, muscles . . . amazing! i could hardly eat half of it, it was so rich, but it was worth it! i must admit, it feels like you're getting a lot older when you start taking people out for your birthday!!
i won't lie, being with jean bernard made my night great!! :)

7 things . . .

2007-05-17T13:36:00.000-07:00

um. . .

1. my superpower is hyper-senses. i can hear and smell a lot of things others cannot.
2. i went to five colleges and i don't have a degree. trinity western university, northwest baptist college, gaviln community college, sacramento city college, and the masters' college. i started out studying theater, which was just silly. then i realized i wanted to work with orphans and switched to early childhood education. but from that point on my goal was not a degree but a good understanding of child growth and development. i never intended to be working in the california school system; i knew i wanted to come here. and i knew i wouldn't need a degree to do this.
3. i hate coffee. i worked coffee shops and cafes since i was sixteen, but i can't stand the stuff. i can sell it like crazy, i'm very good at it. i know a good bean from a bad one. i know enough to know that starbucks burns every bean and makes really bad brews but are EXCELLENT marketers and good employers. nicole makes me a cup of coffee every day and i pour it on my plant shortly after she goes downstairs!!
4. i have a turtle! his name is hurdle. he is a red eared slider and i think he's really cool. (of course he's living in california with some other turtles right now wondering what ever happened to that bald-headed girl he used to live with.)
5. speaking of hair, i really do love my hair. i love it when it's shaved and when it's curly. i think i have good hair. most people want to trade in their hair for someone else's, but i love mine.
6. i love the moon! i say that Jesus gave it to me because i loved it so much and now He trusts me to share it with all of you. it really is mine. it reminds me of God's faithfulness everytime i see it. it is beautiful and gives me peace.
7. i don't browse. i have no real reason to be online once i've finished checking my email. i look at everyone's blogs, of course, but that's about it. i don't browse. i don't like being online so much.

my mama

2007-05-14T13:25:00.000-07:00

i love you, mama! you're the bestest one in the whole wide world! i am sorry i couldn't talk to you yesterday, but i had no time on my phone card and no cash to buy one. and the internet didn't work! good thing i live here or those excuses would seem lame!! thanks for being the greatest mom a girl could ever ask for!

samendia

2007-05-11T21:40:00.000-07:00

2007-05-08T18:16:00.000-07:00

today i went restaurant shopping. that's right. next week is my birthday and i want to eat out and i only know three places to eat in this city, so i made jimmy take me restaurant shopping this afternoon. a long time ago i had found a little place with vital, fiona and bob. i went searching for it and i really liked it. but i could tell that jimmy didn't like it and seeing as how he'll be one of the four people eating with me, i figured that counted for something. as i walked away i said, "i'll take bren there when she comes back." i thought it was fun, but we kept looking. turns out this city has some BEAUTIFUL places to eat! along with some eager restauranteers (one even got my phone number to call me about a reservation - a woman, no comments please!). anyhow, when you come, i have some great ideas in my pocket now and i will take y'all out someday. wait for the pictures, you'll be amazed!

jimmy and junior

2007-05-01T05:54:00.000-07:00

yep, these are the boys i live with. well, jimmy lives here and junior is his cousin who lives all alone. which means he spends a bit of time over here. and who can blame him, really? i mean, we're so much fun. but look at these boys! we've got rooftop soccer, sand covered children, and then the really cool pose! how funny are they? they are amazing friends for me and i adore them!

wrong color, mia!

2007-04-20T19:12:00.000-07:00

happy happy day! we took the kids to the beach for their first time and it was wonderful. it was an incredibly long bus ride and i'm a bit sore, but i'm not sunburnt!! i am thrilled that we, that is three angels, has been able to grow like we have. when i arrived here, i wasn't allowed to sit outside the gate and talk. today we took almost all our kids to the beach! what a difference! our God is moving and i know He has big plans for these kids! pray that we are faithful to Him, to our calling and that we will be discerning in all our decisions!

beach day!

2007-04-15T10:15:00.001-07:00

well, we took the kids, and by kids i mean kynsley, dylan, jimmy, and junior, to the beach yesterday! it was a blast!
we played in hammocks, climbed palm trees, and rode motorcycles! jimmy and junior played in the sand and then we ate some serious (EXTREMELY FRESH) seafood!! (i ate the pregnant lobster! ew.)
what a great day! thank you, Jesus, for Your creation and for days off!

"[we] love technology"

2007-04-09T20:34:00.000-07:00

in the words of kip, "[we] love technology!" these boys don't get to do this very often but dylan has brought lots of fun toys with him so they're loving him!! they can do this all day. wait a minute, they DID do this all day!

you-you's other kids

2007-04-06T09:04:00.000-07:00

jacmel with bren

2007-04-02T16:55:00.000-07:00

so, it was a WONDERFUL day but i'm freakin' sunburnt!!

2007-03-31T17:12:00.000-08:00

so, i had my one year anniversary party. brendie is here and megan was too, it was fun!

she's here!

2007-03-29T19:15:00.000-08:00

well, brendie's here! how exciting is that? i think she had a good first day and she's already talking about people who need to come here. (do i hear a return trip in the making?) shockingly she has fallen in love with the kids and has mentioned putting one in her bag to take home. have we heard that before? anyhow, who thinks we should go to jacmel for a day?

fire!

2007-03-25T13:31:00.000-08:00

so i was drying my dishes with nicole and suddenly there was popping and smoke and i thought someone had thrown something through the window . . . but then i realized that there was an electircal fire. when the electricity came on one of the cords that had a small power strip on it burnt up and was flaming. so i beat at it with my dishtowel (still in hand) and called for jimmy. he came right away but i had already put it out (so so talented!). and so i took this picture to share with all of you the fun fun life of you-you!

love you!

i can't help it!

2007-03-24T19:17:00.000-08:00

i just love playing with my hair!! i guess megan does too! turns out i can cut hair well! i rock!

bren

2007-03-18T14:04:00.000-08:00

oh brendie, how do i love thee? can you tell why i'm excited that this girl is coming to see me? can you even begin to imagine the fun we're going to have?

come soon, b!

2007-03-16T19:33:00.000-08:00

don't say it! i know i post a lot of pics of guerda but megan took this one and i love it! plus, i can post pictures again!!

days gone by

2007-03-14T16:16:00.000-08:00

hello all! this is yet another post without pictures! i'm sorry, but blogger won't register any pics i try to upload. i don't really understand why and i'm praying it's temporary. so let me tell you about what i did. you may or may not know that a girl named megan is staying here for the month of march. she is doing art projects with the children and we painted some verses on the wall of the missionary room. but yesterday i (don't be mad) took A DAY OFF! it's true. well, part of a day. but it was great. we went up to the hotel montana (the hotel rancho had a conference going on and doesn't yet have the business smarts of the montana who also had a conference) and went swimming! oh glorious day. or two hours, but really. it was wonderful. and we had ice cream the day before. and we found amazing hibiscus flowers that i wanted to show you but can't. and we had watermelon. it's been great!

next week frank's group will come and then . . . BRENDIE!! i'm just a bit excited and i think i'll take a day or two off then too! love you all and miss you!

from angela to you-you

2007-03-09T18:26:00.000-08:00

one year! from english to kreyol. from volunteer to house manager. from uncertain to "fo." ou ka we mwen vin pi fo. my God is moving! from sophia to samara, children are finding forever families. from 1 to 12 in evansville (they say 13, maybe i can't count). from angela to you-you. from air mattress to tropical paradise . . . almost! from temporary to . . . ? the support of my family (actual and church) and my friends, the support of the three angels staff and administration has been overwhelming. the confidence that has been put in me is staggering. i went to the roof last night and this morning to watch the moon and to pray. to pray that i might hold up under the responsibility put upon me. that of these children, the employees, the daily finances, the adoptive families, the supporting churches; like i said it's a bit overwhelming. to me, anyhow. but not to my God, may His name be praised. thank you all for walking with me through this year! please keep me in your prayers!

2007-03-04T16:59:00.000-08:00

i really want to share this with you all: i have been here for nearly a year now and as a lot of you know, i have been wanting to have a REAL conversation with my employees. well, yesterday i had my first one! i was so thrilled, but then i didn't have internet to tell you all about it. i was able to reference bible verses with them and discuss what the Word of God has to say about outward appearances verses matters of the heart.
jimmy put in a fake earring just to hear what i would say but some of the more fundamental nannies saw it and wanted to know if i thought it was okay. i explained that while i didn't like it for jimmy, it was not wrong for him to wear it. they told me that in 1 cor. 11, we are told otherwise. but i turned to that chapter and was able to show them that it doesn't actually say that at all. i was able to show them that we are living in the grace of God. that there are things, very specific things, that the Lord tells us to abstain from and to the best of my ability with the Holy Spirit, i abstain from such things. i am a sinner, i will never say otherwise, but my sin is not cutting my hair or wearing jeans. these things are not written in the Word of God. Jesus looks at my heart, not my pants.

well, that was a beginning. someday i'll be able to say that i understand that your pants can be a reflection of your heart and so on, but for now that was really exciting for me! thanks for those of you who have been praying to that end for me! please keep it up!

it's just that. . .

2007-03-02T19:24:00.000-08:00

. . . i haven't had a 12 year old before. so this is all new to me. do they always eat this much? and do they always mix the weirdest things together? this is my 12 year old, woodrut. and yes, he is putting butter, mustard and peanut butter on his sandwich! ew.

we play "soccer" and he's teaching me some tricks. he visits me almost everyday after school. tonight he came after dance and he got a little sleepy!

2007-03-01T19:49:00.000-08:00

okay, i know you all saw this picture on the kids' blog, but look what ti mari'm made for me! how great is that?

bumper to bumper on the james lick

2007-02-27T20:25:00.000-08:00

this one's for my papa! when i was growing up we lived south of the bay area in a very very rural town. (i'm talking hick, folks.) but for some reason (maybe because he was happy he wasn't in it), my dad always listened to the traffic report for the bay. and every afternoon you could count on the man in the helicopter calling in to say that it was "bumper to bumper on the james lick." that's a big freeway they have up there. i remember driving on it once with my dad and he was so happy it wasn't rush hour!

anyhow, i was thinking about traffic and how long it takes to do anything in this country and i thought i'd show you a picture of our "traffic." not that there aren't cars out there too, but this really does make it hard to drive over 11 miles an hour!!

good hair day

2007-02-27T20:22:00.000-08:00

watch out, sevensveele!

2007-02-27T20:19:00.000-08:00

this boy is coming your way!! todd, kristina, i just had to take this picture! he was walking around like this and i called him upstairs for a shot! look at this little man!

oh my gosh!

2007-02-20T05:35:00.000-08:00

when did noah get so big? he's huge! look at him! a lot of you have been commenting lately about how big the kids are getting. i can't believe it. when i got here noah was sleeping in a crib, jonas could barely talk, bethany was scared of all white people, mia was . . . difficult, nicot was an infant! i mean, when did they grow up? and guerda!! well, she's one of our little miracles, isn't she?!

v day

2007-02-15T19:41:00.000-08:00

yeah, that's right. if you know me, you may know that valentine's day is not my favorite day. i just think that people should love each other every day, not just when the date dictates it. and that girls are usually stupid. (it makes sense, just go with it.) anyhow, jimmy may have been a bit worried about my not so entusiastic attitude toward the day and he sent me these AMAZING flowers!! and all i'm saying is, if i got this with a note about being his best friend, what kind of day did his girlfriend have?!

gail and jody

2007-02-09T19:44:00.000-08:00

these wonderful people are part of my family by the grace of God! how awesome that He brought us together here in this other world?! how fun to watch the superbowl in haiti with americans who really do love football! (most of the team was from indiana!)

it is i,

2007-02-03T21:20:00.000-08:00

your fearless leader, you-you!
what a day! we have a great team here that flew in last night. michelle is here; she "surprised" me by coming! gail and jody are here! today i made breakfast for 31 chidren (normal for saturday mornings), was able to winess and take part in michelle's continuous family-making process (she asked lourdesmilla and sutherlande if she could be their mama), think we bought a car, helped organized boxes upon boxes of supplies, GOT A PICTURE AND HANDPRINT OF WOODVENSLY, and gave my very first employee meeting in creole!

i'm a bit tired! goodnight!